Shoulds Don’t Work
Who else remembers learning to read? One of the exercises we had to do was to practice reading out loud. We would be reading a story in class and we'd all take turns reading a paragraph. I would figure out which paragraph was mine and then, instead of listening to the other kids, I would practice my paragraph in my head so that when it was my turn to read, I would be perfect.
It rarely worked, especially when the teacher would skip around the rows, not doing things in order as she was supposed to do.
The angst of it all.......
We do the same thing with animals - we're so busy thinking about what they *should* be doing and assuming that’s what they’re going to do, that we can miss what is actually happening.
That *should* often comes from outside sources: the wisdom from the latest social media fad, what has worked in similar situations for friends and relatives, and from authority figures, such as animal communicators, trainers and wellness professionals.
We often miss what the animals are indicating as we're action and result oriented. It seems like a specific set of shoulds *should* work for us and *should* be the most expedient way to achieve the goal we want.
Meh.
When horse Shiloh was alive he would often tell me "You can't help that you're human" and "You're not listening to me, you have an agenda". Wise boy.
So, paraphrased straight from the horse's mouth: put your agenda aside and notice the animal in front of you.
Taking the animals’ lead
Look for and follow patterns in their behavior. If Fluffy is getting ready to knock something off the table, what does she do immediately before that action? If your horse is getting ready to buck, what does he do immediately before that action?
Be discerning in what advice or information you receive from outside sources. I am not saying indiscriminately toss away that information. I am saying if your vet has recommended a medication or a food and you see your cat not touching it was a 10 foot pole, go back to the vet. What are the alternatives? Is there a different form of that medication that might be more amenable to the cat? What food will still benefit the cat and yet has more natural ingredients?
Combine your intuition with knowledge and facts. Anytime we are in intuitive communication with an animal, we are processing that information through our own lenses, and as Shiloh so aptly pointed out to me, those lenses could be the result of using using a human lens with an agenda. Let your intuition complement what you are observing the animal experience IRL.
True kinship with animals is an organic experience, not a standard protocol.
How do you follow an animal’s lead?
If you would like to work together and co-create a plan on how you can begin to follow an animal’s lead, click below.
